12.27.10: We did a stupid thing

We did a stupid thing last night.

One of our favorite shows is Man v. Food. The premise of the show is that the host (Adam Richmond) goes around the country and eats at local pig out spots. So if he were to come to Provo, he would eat at J-Dawgs and Cafe Rio. He eats at 2 local favorites and then concludes the episode with a food challenge, like eating 5 pounds of burrito in 1 hour.

Well, last season he came to Salt Lake and last month we saw the episode. Naturally we had to go to the restaurants where he ate. (We make it a point to go to restaurants where Adam eats--we ate at Beth's Cafe in Seattle [disgusting] and the Hominy Grill in Charleston). It just so happened that when Adam came to Salt Lake, he did a food challenge at a sushi restaurant. Sushi being one of our favorite foods, we decided to eat there. Greg, after watching how easily Adam defeated the challenge, decided he would also attempt the Hellfire Sushi challenge.

And this is Greg's story.

We started the evening at McDonald's where Rex got a happy meal, which he didn't eat, and Greg got a hamburger. It was all part of the strategy--he didn't want to eat all the spicy sushi on an empty stomach.

Once at the restaurant and seated, he started the challenge. Well, actually the qualifying rounds. In order to try the challenge, Greg had to first eat 1 piece of the #6 spicy tuna roll. He did this with ease. Andrea and Mike, who came along for the ride, also tried some. Rex and I did not.
Here's the #6 roll. Looks pretty tasty.
The second qualifying round was 2 pieces of the #6.5 spicy tuna roll. Greg also completed this with some ease. He did drink a glass of milk and said it was quite a bit spicier, but was still confident in his abilities.
Now he could start the challenge. He had to eat 6 pieces of the #7 (Hellfire) spicy tuna roll.

Now when Adam did the challenge, the chef brought out all 6 pieces on the same plate at the same time so Adam could just power through all the rolls at once.

When Greg did the challenge, the chef only made two pieces. Greg ate those and asked for the next two. And waited. And waited. And waited. We waited upwards of 15 to 20 minutes for the next two pieces. By that time, the first two had had time to work their magic on Greg's stomach. Knowing that what he was feeling at that moment would only get worse, Greg made the choice not to continue.

We paid the bill; Greg ran next door to get some antacid from the grocery store; and we started our drive home. I drove, while Greg sat quietly in the passenger seat. By the time we got to 800 North in Orem, Greg was...well he sounded like he was in labor and asked me to take him to the hospital. I was just about to get off the freeway when his contraction passed and he decided we should just go home. When we got off on the Provo Center Street exit, Greg was in hard labor and ordering me to drive faster and faster to the hospital. After a bit of trouble finding the Emergency, we got Greg checked in. I ran home (it was 10 pm by this time), practically threw Rex in bed, took the monitor to our tenet and sped back to the hospital.

When I returned, Greg was doing much better. The nurse had just given him some pain killers and he was relaxing. And then the nurse left, and it was time to start pushing. We've spent the day discussing which is more painful: labor or spicy-sushi-induced ulcer. I think Greg wins. After some begging, Greg got some morphine. We hung out for a while longer to make sure the morphine actually worked and were home by midnight.

Diagnosis: repeat of the ulcer Greg got on his mission in Bolivia.

Greg is feeling much better today. His tummy is still a little hurty, so we'll be eating chicken soup here for a few days.

So, yes, we did a stupid thing and ended up in the ER.

But we'd thank to thank our wonderful tenet who spent the night at home listening to the monitor and our wonderful neighbors and friends the Thayers and the Hepworths, who came at a moment's notice in suits and ties to give Greg a blessing. It's comforting to know that we can call on our neighbors at all hours and they'll be there. So thanks for being our friends and thanks for being worthy.