My mind is a revolving door of NO MORE BABIES and GIVE ME ALL THE BABIES lately mixed with a bit of GROW UP and STOP GROWING and CUDDLE ME FOREVER and TOUCH ME ONE MORE TIME AND SEEE WHAT HAPPENS. It seems like the solutions to all of my problems are the start of new problems. I want more sleep: have the babies grow up. But then I have no babies and that's a new problem. I want a clean house: have the babies grow up. But then I have no babies. And having no babies is just...sad.
People talk about high school being the best time of their lives but we all know that that's a load of manure because if high school was the high point then, well, this life just isn't worth living. But when real adults (I'm not a real adult yet, I'm not sure what qualifies one as a real adult, but it's not me), talk about their children being babies as the high point, I just might agree. It's not perfect. I haven't slept more than 3 hours straight in years, but I also spent two days at the park this week. And after-babies, as in teenagers, I hear are just horrible. They may sleep through the night and morning, but they have emotional ranges beyond "I'm mad at him because he drank my soda." Teenagers have real problems that are hard to solve. And then the teenagers leave and it's just you. And while the idea of setting my schedule not according to nap time sounds nice, I really do like nap time and most empty nesters I know just talk about how much they miss having little babies.
I'm trying to look forward to growing children and making lists.
Things to look forward to with older children:
1. Family temple trips
2. Reading Harry Potter together
3. Family bike rides longer than 30 minutes
4. Running without a jogging stroller
5....
Ok so I've got 4 things to look forward to as my children age. I don't really know where this post is going--just shows you that state of mush my mind is in and the chaos inside it--I love having babies but I also like it less than I do other things and it's weird to like and dislike the same thing at the same moment. I'm not really sure what to do with or call that emotion.
On that confusing note, some pictures of our activities lately
Rex building an obstacle course one warm January day.
Zora got to play on playground equipment for the first time this week and thought it was the best thing ever.
Henry insisted on joining me for my daily nap one day. Not much napping occurred but I forgave him...eventually.
