7.29.11

It's been a while.

I've been busy.

But I still have nothing to say.

Greg left me a week and a day ago--well not really left me. I mean he did, but not really. He's now in North Carolina working while I am here packing. Well, I was packing until I ran out of boxes so I'm waiting until someone can sit with Rex for an hour or so while he sleeps so I can go get more. But I do have most of the house packed--I just need to finish the kitchen and Rex's room, but I don't want to do those yet because we still need to eat and Rex still needs to play.

I am so sick of my house being a mess/full of boxes. Rex keeps telling me the house is messy and that I should clean it.

Yesterday I made reservations for a moving truck. It arrives August 17th. We'll load it on the 20th. Greg will leave again with my car shortly thereafter. I will stay in Utah for five more days and then...I'll be gone.

Rex pooped on my bed this morning.

I had an appointment with my midwives here today. I will miss them. I really liked most of them--there was one that I didn't like as much but whatever. I am measuring a week behind. They don't care. I could kiss them.

I've been having contractions all day--Braxton Hicks I do believe. I didn't have these with Rex.

I found a doula that I really like. She's even-handed in her opinions and will balance out my over-zealousness, I hope.

I think I found a group of midwives that I like. But then I got an email saying they were terrible. I've decided to go on gut-feeling/the Spirit on this one since I won't have time to switch practices once I get to Charlotte. I'll be 9 months (36 weeks) on the day I arrive in North Carolina and nearly 37 by the time I actually get to Charlotte.

Now I just need to figure out what my new insurance will cover.

I cleaned out the garage last night. I parked my car in it today.

Rex is really into coloring and reading lately. That's all he wants to do. He draws pictures of Daddy with two blue eyes, a nose, a mouth and sometimes hair. When he's done drawing, we read library books over and over again. He likes me to read with him (he's memorized parts of the books so he "reads" those parts) for an hour at a time. Rex has been nearly perfect since Greg left. I'm calling it a tender mercy of the Lord that Rex is into low energy activities that I can easily do with him in my fattened and increasingly immobile state.

I ate five cookies today and have gained 24 pounds so far. Maybe I need to eat fewer cookies. But they literally talk to me.

I am super lonely. But only for Greg. We are not good phone talkers so I only talk to him for like 20 minutes a day. We used to talk for hours when we were dating, but now...I guess we've gotten used to not having to have a sustained conversation and then being able to say one or two things to each other whenever we have something to say.

I read the story of Job the other day to Rex. It made me feel better. Sometimes (ok, let's be honest here, all the time) I think that if I pray about something, I should get it in some form or other, especially if it has to do with more closely living the commandments. Well so did Job and life still sucked for him. I gained some insight into my own life. Even when I pray to more closely live the commandments, life can and will be hard and may get harder and that's just the way it is. It doesn't mean I'm a bad person or that God doesn't love me or isn't listening, it's just the way things are. Let's see how long I can remember this lesson.

I've read the entire Ensign this month. First time ever. Like I said, Greg has been gone for over a week now.

I'm trying to be positive about this move. But I am jealous that we are moving to Greg's home and not mine. Mine is here. Everything that's important to me is here. Except Greg. So I guess I'll move.