A Few Anniversaries

I know it's been a while and I'm not really into back-blogging because then you end up reading about Easter at Christmas and it just gets confusing.  BUT, I had a few big anniversaries that I thought I should comment on.

First, my 10-year high school reunion was in August.  I thought about going for like...never. I decided on graduation day that I was never going back.  High school was terrible enough the first, why would I want to go back?  Seriously, if I walk into a high school today--any given high school, I still get sick to my stomach and anxious.  I feel like a caged animal.  (Ever wonder why I refused to anything above 8th grade?)  I did have one girl ask me if I was going to the reunion.  I really wanted to say "*@^@#*&^*$^& no! Even if you paid me a million dollars, I'd have to think really hard about it" but I thought that might hurt her feelings so I told a half truth--I said we spent all our vacation money and time going to Utah for a couple family reunions.  But as mentioned, even if we hadn't gone to Utah and someone gave me a million dollars...  You get the point: I wasn't going to go.

Graduation with a buddy from art class (Sachi Swanburg)

I should add in here that my sister Amber says that I couldn't go to my high school reunion anyway, because it might end up a little more like Liz Lemon's (where Liz finds out that all the cool kids were actually trying to be nice but Liz was just a sarcastic jerk) than I'd like to admit.  And Amber is probably right.  So why test it?

There are, however, a few things from 10 years ago that I'd reunion with anytime.

1. This keyboard.  This very key board with which I am currently typing.  I got this keyboard on graduation day and still love it.  It's been with me through long term papers, witty emails, not-so-juicy love letters (you read this blog, you know how sentimental I can get sometimes), and a few angry letters to Satan (aka my insurance company).  Please, bury me with this keyboard.

2. My phone number.  Although I rarely claim California anymore, I still like the idea that people I cared enough about in high school to give my number to, still have my number.  Always the same.  You can still reach me at my good-ol' 209 number.  And it's going to stay that way.  With as often as we move, it's nice to know that any one I've crossed paths with enough to exchange numbers can still call me.  And I can still call you.  Because I still have all my old numbers from my first phone.  A few years ago, I did delete all the old boyfriends as I figured I'd been married a few years so that was going to stick and I didn't need the back-ups any more.

3. Greg.  I've known Greg for ten years now.  November we celebrate 10 years of openly admitting of mutual pleasure of being in each other's company (our first kiss--ahhh).  While the first few years were wrought with passion and pain and longing (young love, mission, multiple breakups), that last few have been filled with the quiet peace that only comes from living with your best friend who has smelled your stinkiest farts (and you his) and knowing that he stills loves you anyway.

At a dance freshman year with our perpetual 3rd wheel and my best friend, Ashlie--notice Greg looking at Ashlie.  He actually went out with her before he ever went out with me, which did not go well.  The story of that (horrible) date was my first introduction to Greg, and yet, I still married him...

I am now old enough to say "5 or 10 years ago" because 5 years is not a long time to me any more.

My next anniversary is my 2 years of living in Charlotte.  Last year, I started several posts on what I'd learned living in Charlotte, but couldn't finish them because they brought too much pain and homesickness.  I'm not going to lie, moving to Charlotte has not been easy.  Maybe not the hardest thing I've ever done (did you miss the part about high school), but pretty close.  I still miss Utah every day.  I still think that Charlotte is a miserable place to live.  BUT thanks to my multicultural professors a few semesters back, I've learned to deal with the lose better.

In Western culture, we have a tendency to dichotomize everything.  It's either black or white; good or evil; a cat or a dog; human or not; Provo or Charlotte.  We constantly compare and rank--good is better than evil; dogs are better than cats; Provo is better than Charlotte.  And even if we aren't ranking, we're comparing.  In the words of Elder Uchtdorf, "Stop it."  So I've tried really hard to stop comparing and ranking.  Charlotte is what is it.  Provo is what it is.  They exist in completely separate spheres that don't need to be compared or ranked.  So I'm not going to list the things that Charlotte has that Provo doesn't or that Provo has and Charlotte doesn't, because they exist separately and are things unto themselves.  And while I still really hope I don't end up in Charlotte permanently, in the eternal perspective, I happen to know that (my) heaven is in Provo.  So when we all die: look me up, I'll be at 256 South 400 West, Provo, Utah.  Until then, I'm just trying to let Charlotte be what it is and accept and embrace it for that.